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I thought some on here may appreciate this, it was sent to me from a far distant rellie.

To Be Sung to the Tune of
GOD REST YE MERRY GENTLEMEN


Good Wishes, family history buffs,
Wherever you may be,
It's time to close that pc down
And raise a glass with me;
We've done our best the whole year through
Our ancestors to find:
So lets drink to that ever-growing tree,
(This round's on me!)
Let's drink to that ever-growing tree.

We know it's not an easy task
To trace Great-uncle Jim,
Who went to Burma, married thrice,
And lived a life of sin;
He ran off with the parson's daughter -
She was number three -
So let's drink to that ever-growing tree
(This round's on me!)
Let's drink to that ever-growing tree.

Alo-ysius Finkelbaum
Is not a common name,
You'd think he'd crop up somewhere
But he's hiding just the same;
Tried IGI, the Census, FRC and BMD -
Hell, let's drink to that ever-growing tree,
(Thish roundsh on me!)
Let's drink to that ever-growing tree.

Tom Gadsden was a mariner - in 1691
He hopped the twig in Nevis
After too long in the sun,
But how to find his resting-place
Will be the death of ME!
Let's drink to that ever-growing tree,
(Da de da dee)
Let's drink to that ever-growing tree.

Though brick walls may confound us
And our eyes are growing dim,
We'll never stop our searching
For that one elusive limb -
We're addicts and we're proud of it
As anyone can see,
So let's drink to that ever-growing tree -
(Hic - no more for me!)
Let's drink to that ever-growing tree.
*

_________________
Gloria

I'd be dangerous with a brain.

Brilliant Gloria, I like that.

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

A Genealogist’s Christmas

Your Christmas tree has microfiche where tinsel ought to be
There’s a monument, not a fairy, on the top
Your family’s all at midnight mass last thing on Christmas Eve,
You’re out looking round the graveyard for the plot.

Old Father Time’s a problem, cos you’ve never found his kids
And there must have been a Mrs Time, all right?
You think about the three wise men, out following the star
And wonder where they were on census night.

And then there’s Father Christmas – just what was his date of birth?
Does the North Pole have a register on line?
Was he christened Nicholas, or Santa or just Claus?
Oh why can’t they use the same name all the time!

It’s a genealogist’s nightmare, but it’s time to let it go
Deck mistletoe and holly down the hall
Go find yourself a proper tree – a Norway spruce or such
As I wish you Merry Christmas, one and all.

Nice one Portia.

_________________
Gloria

I'd be dangerous with a brain.

I do like these. Anyone got anymore?

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse.
The dining room table with clutter was spread
With pedigree charts and with letters which said...
"Too bad about the data for which you wrote
Sank in a storm on an ill fated boat."
Stacks of old copies of wills and the such
Were proof that my work had become much too much.
Our children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads.
And I at my table was ready to drop
From work on my album with photos to crop.

Christmas was here, and of such was my lot
That presents and goodies and toys I forgot.
Had I not been so busy with grandparent's wills,
I'd not have forgotten to shop for such thrills.
While others had bought gifts that would bring Christmas cheer;
I'd spent time researching those birth dates and years.

While I was thus musing about my sad plight,
A strange noise on the lawn gave me such a great fright.
Away to the window I flew in a flash,
Tore open the drapes and I yanked up the sash.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear?
But an overstuffed sleigh and eight small reindeer.

Up to the housetop the reindeer they flew,
With a sleigh full of toys, and old Santa Claus too.
And then in a twinkle, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of thirty-two hoofs.
The TV antenna was no match for their horns,
And look at our roof with hoof-prints adorned.

As I drew in my head, and bumped it on the sash,
Down the cold chimney fell Santa - KER-RASH!
"Dear" Santa had come from the roof in a wreck,
And tracked soot on the carpet, (I could wring his short neck!)
Spotting my face, good old Santa could see
I had no Christmas spirit, you'd have to agree.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work
And filled all the stockings, (I felt like a jerk).
Here was Santa, who'd brought us such gladness and joy;
When I'd been too busy for even one toy.
He spied my research on the table all spread
"A genealogist!" He cried! (My face was all red!)

"Tonight I've met many like you", Santa grinned.
As he pulled from his sack a large book he had penned.
I gazed with amazement - the cover it read
"Genealogy Lines for Which You Have Plead."
"I know what it's like as a genealogy bug,"
He said as he gave me a great Santa Hug.

"While the elves make the sleighful of toys I now carry,
I do some research in the North Pole Library!
A special treat I am thus able to bring,
To genealogy folks who can't find a thing.
Now off you go to your bed for a rest,
I'll clean up the house from this genealogy mess."

As I climbed up the stairs full of gladness and glee,
I looked back at Santa who'd brought much to me.
While settling in bed, I heard Santa's clear whistle,
To his team which then rose like the down of a thistle
And I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight,
"Family History is Fun! Merry Christmas! Goodnight!"

Author unknown

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

Gawd...I love you people!

The twelve days of a genealogy Christmas

On the twelfth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Twelve census searches
Eleven family bibles
Ten e-mail contacts
Nine headstone rubbings
Eight birth and death dates
Seven town clerks sighing
Six second cousins
Five coats of arms
Four GEDCOM files
Three old wills
Two CD-ROMs
And a branch in my family tree.

--Author Unknown

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

All I Want for Christmas

Dear Santa: Don't bring me new dishes,
I don't need a new kind of game.
Genealogists have peculiar wishes
For Christmas I just want a surname.

A new washing machine would be great,
But it's not the desire of my life.
I've just found an ancestor's birth date;
What I need now is the name of his wife.

My heart doesn't yearn for a ring
That would put a real diamond to shame.
What I want is a much cheaper thing;
Please give me Mary's last name.

To see my heart singing with joy,
Don't bring me a read leather suitcase,
Bring me a genealogist's toy;
a surname with dates and a place.

- Author Unknown.

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

Mel, where on earth are you getting all these from?

I've been trawling the tinternet this morning.

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

Thought I would revive this one

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

HOLIDAY EATING TIPS

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Holiday spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare.. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Holiday party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate and wine in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Have a great holiday season!!

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!

Revived again for Christmas

_________________
Mel

Searching for lost relatives? Win the Lottery!